Do you TRUST me? It’s a very direct and revealing question, isn’t it? One month ago today, I was participating in a discussion on blab (blab.im) and the trust issue surfaced. I noticed checking the blab before entering that trust and honesty were being discussed and decided to enter as these are two of my very favorite topics. A new friend, Roy Montero, was asking the hostess “do you trust me” off the record. I was fascinated with this question and how the hostess struggled to answer it.
When I entered the room, we began talking: just the three of us for most of the time. I had been following Roy Montero on blab for 20-30 hours or so. I noticed that he always added quality and value to the blabs and that he had a unique gift for communication using his voice. Sometimes we judge things by their outer appearance and don’t trust people if we don’t like what we perceive. Anyway, Roy does not show his face on blab, which is fine with me. Many people do the same thing, including one disabled friend of mine who also doesn’t like to show his face on blab sometimes.
Roy first asked the host: Do you trust me? with the recording going. This put the hostess on the spot a little: at first she said no, then she said, well, I don’t mistrust you. But I don’t trust you with my checkbook. So somewhere between no to maybe (she softened the no to maybe).
Then Roy asked me: Do you trust me? And I said, Absolutely, yes, I trust you because…and gave my reasons: I’ve been watching you on blab for 20-30 hours, you provide tremendous value and you have a great gift with your voice. Whether or not you show your face on blab is immaterial to me. I told Roy he had a great gift of gab on blab and that he needed to make sure he did more on this platform to help others to better master it.
Remember the movie A Few Good Men and the line: You can’t handle the TRUTH!!! ? (I always thought that the word truth should have been emphasized, not handle.) The truth will set us free if we have the courage to find it, believe it, and speak it.
Trust is a critical core value that we need in order to create, maintain, and grow strong relationships. We have to try to build that trust with each other and find common ground as diplomatically as possible, building bridges so we can link arms with each other on important issues.
Is it possible to lose trust? Yes, if we break each other’s expectations of trust, it is. But it is possible to earn trust back through forgiveness and negotiation.
Closing thought:
Just because we cannot see someone does not mean we should not trust him/her. Sometimes seeing is believing but sometimes looks can be deceiving (e.g., magic tricks and optical illusions).
Faith is the realization of things of what is hoped for and evidence of things unseen. Hebrews 11:1
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